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Briefly this morning, this single story about the homicidal tendencies of your footwear amounted to the entirety of CNN's "Newspulse." While they'll claim it was a glitch, we think it was more an effort for the site to be honest and finally report only on the stories they want to cover. Considering the kind of news that broke yesterday, we were just happy to get a break from headlines about horrid men sexually assaulting everything that moves. Seriously though, your shoes are killing you, and it's time to fight back!