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NOTES
05/17/2012
More of the most awkward, entertaining, or horrifying notes ever written by a roommate.
Whether you're in your post-college years or your mid-forties and sleeping in your old room at your parents' house, the roommate situation is a hotbed of hostility and spoiled food-borne...
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ETSY
05/02/2012
The most unappetizing piece of dishware ever sold to humans.
This Etsy item is the perfect dishware for anyone who wants to exacerbate their eating disorder. You'll never want to finish your meal if you know it will only make you witness yet again the...
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FACEBOOK
02/16/2012
The most unsettling confessions ever posted on Facebook.
Mother of God! These posts make us wonder how many people posting to Facebook are on their death bed, hoping that a priest reads their final status update and leaves a comment absolving them of their...
8 comments
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VALENTINE'S DAY
02/14/2012
The most literally nauseating Valentine's Day plans ever conceived.
We're not sure what happened to Jim Pynn in his past that made him want to destory every successful relationship in New York City, but that sure seems like the goal here. "Watching raw human...
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VALENTINE'S DAY
02/09/2012
How to reference a notoriously disturbing movie in an adorable Valentine's Day card.
We maintain that this might be the most romantic Valentine's Day sentiment ever put to a card. We won't go into all the things this person is giving up for you (eating food instead of...
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NEWS
01/26/2012
How to cause morning workplace evacuations on a daily basis.
Thanks to Taco Bell, the Most Important Meal of the Day is about to become the Most Shamefully Disgusting. We have no idea what these ground-beef-splattered mad scientists are about to unleash upon...
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HEADLINES
01/11/2012
The most disgusting headline we've ever been so ashamed to find hilarious.
Here's hoping she took that dead kid to the cleaners! Speaking of cleaners, we want to see the complaint she filed with the court. You just know she tried to get compensation for her dry cleaning...
5 comments
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CHRISTMAS SEASON
12/24/2011
7 more merrily inappropriate Christmas decorations.
Burst Of Holiday Cheer Christmas can mean different and disturbing things to different people, and no one should tell you how to creepily express your excitement for this most wonderful time of...
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VIDEOS
11/28/2011
Watch a first kiss between virgins that will make you never want to have sex again.
This is a clip from an upcoming reality show on TLC about adults who've never had sex, called Virgin Diaries. And that clinking you hear is the sound of every abstinent teenager in America...
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RECEIPTS
07/13/2011
The last thing you ever want to see on a restaurant receipt.
Apparently the food at "Raging Burrito" is mostly "Raging" with insect infestation. It seems to have become such a common occurrence that they've added a convenient button for...
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Older Posts
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Notes
More of the most awkward, entertaining, or horrifying notes ever written by a roommate.
Photoshop
How to use Photoshop to make it look like your drunk friend had the night of his life.
Notes
Overprotective mom and dad leave extremely different goodbye notes.
Cartoons
What your entire life looks like when you're too picky about who you date.
Signs
Bathroom sign imposes unbelievably bizarre restriction.
Happy Place Original
What a brutally honest college diploma looks like.
Signs
Restaurant delivers best possible response to bad internet review.
Notes
More of the most entertaining, obnoxious, or completely insane notes written to neighbors.
Sex
The most convincing sales pitch for condoms in the history of procreation.
Lists
Stephen Colbert named 69th most beautiful woman in the world.
MORE POSTS »
TV News
Reporter's skirt adjustment nearly turns news clip into porn clip.
TV News
The most awkward conceivable way to declare you need a tan.
The Gays
The single-most deranged anti-gay rant ever read calmly into a microphone.
TV
What it would look like if every Sunday night show you watch was combined into one.
Food
Real-life Homer Simpson protests all-you-can-eat restaurant for cutting him off.
Videos
Heartfelt music video about Facebook more embarrassing than your friends' status updates.
Videos
Kids reenact Sabotage video in honor of MCA.
Videos
If Taxi Driver had been a Disney movie.
Mother's Day
How to compensate your mom for the grossest thing she ever did for you.
MORE VIDEOS »
Ben Greenman
Facebook stock should have its own Timeline so it can look back on happier days, like last Friday.
Jenny Johnson
Most people don't know this, but you can quietly be a Republican or a Democrat.
Ken Jennings
Matthew Fox is like the Windows XP of Jon Hamm.
Nicole Betz
I stay up at night worrying about what happens to the unquestioned Jeopardy answers.
kelly oxford
It's Morrissey's birthday today; spend a minute thinking about how crazy it is that he never killed himself.
h. jon benjamin
so far today, i read the ny times and googled 'hulk porn'
jon hendren
"i'm a passionate gamer" says incredible waste of human life
Michael Ian Black
Pretty sure most people aren't spending nearly enough time thinking about me.
IanWearsPants
I don't think I've ever initiated a conversation.
Matt Koff
LinkedIn is just one more way I've never connected with my dad.
MJ
I always make out with the entire restaurant staff before I eat anywhere, just so they know that spitting in my food won't be necessary.
Alex Blagg
I bet a chronological list of everything I've "liked" on the Internet would read like a short story about a man falling apart.
Michelle Wolf
if i ever want to get back at someone i'm dating, i just wipe back to front
donni
There must be a few vegetarians who just enjoy murdering vegetables.
Rob Kutner
Probably one of the hardest things for Pinocchio to pull off was complimenting his friend's experimental theater piece.
Megan Amram
I got out of jury duty by being the defendant
Gary Janetti
Never getting married. I don't need a piece of paper to tell me it's okay to emotionally torture someone.
Ari Scott
I hope God is almost done putting people on this earth to sing.
Jim Gaffigan
If there was an award for most pessimistic, I probably wouldn't even be nominated.
Leah Beckmann
I know I'm killing it if I'm having more of "hahaha" than a "haha" gchat kind of day.
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Headlines
One of the most creatively disgusting ways to get revenge on your boss.
News
5 people having a worse Monday than you.
Advice
Advice column receives letter from worst man you could possibly sleep with.
News
How every man wants to die.
Headlines
How not to treat a 79-year-old world-renowned actor.
Headlines
How an attempt at the perfect prom photo can go horribly wrong.
Mondays
5 people having a worse Monday than you.
Headlines
Headline about gay marriage succeeds in being as blatantly sexual as possible.
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Just wanted to let you know that I love you even though you aren't naked right now.
Sorry I can't make it to your party, dinner, or event because I want to watch previously recorded television.
No amount of tanning will ever change how hopelessly white you are.
Here's to the Yankees and Red Sox making their historic rivalry a battle for last place.
Summer has snuck up once again on me and my giant ass.
I heard you go down even faster than Facebook stock.
May you live to be so old that your driving terrifies people.
There should be a holiday dedicated to all the brave people who show up to work on Mondays.
I can't wait to start blaming my normal lack of productivity on it being summertime.
If I was your coworker, I'd sexually harass you.
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