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LISTS
yesterday
Stephen Colbert named 69th most beautiful woman in the world.
In the most relevant thing it's done since it gave you something to masturbate to before you found out about real porn, Maxim Magazine has named the decidedly male Stephen Colbert one of its 100...
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NOTES
05/21/2012
More of the most entertaining, obnoxious, or completely insane notes written to neighbors.
As the earth's population continues to grow, humans are forced to live in ever closer proximity to each other, pissing each other off in new and disgusting ways. The neighbor note is the most...
67 comments
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FACEBOOK
05/18/2012
The 50 least valuable things ever posted on Facebook.
It's Facebook IPO day! Now that the world's biggest enemy of productivity is going public, maybe it's time to take a closer look at the statuses and wall posts that turned this behemoth...
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FACEBOOK
05/16/2012
More of the most creatively designed Facebook Timeline profiles.
Since the launch of Facebook Timeline, we haven't really bothered to do anything with our new profile layout — mostly because we've been too busy posting angry status updates about...
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LISTS
05/14/2012
More yearbook quotes and photos that don't bode well for our future.
It's an annual tradition for graduating high schoolers to submit a few final words of wisdom to accompany their senior portraits in the yearbook. It's the perfect time to reference your...
52 comments
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MOTHER'S DAY
05/10/2012
25 moms being horribly embarrassing on Facebook.
This Mother's Day, let your mom know how much you value your relationship with her by unfriending her on Facebook. There's no better way to say, "Mother, I love you more than the whole...
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LISTS
05/09/2012
The most hilariously effective signs supporting gay marriage.
Political protests are always a little more fun when the protesters are a little more fabulous. Yesterday's vote to put a gay marriage ban in North Carolina's constitution was a depressing...
1303 comments
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TATTOOS
05/08/2012
More of the most painfully obvious spelling and grammar mistakes ever seen in tattoos.
You'd think people wouldn't sit in a chair and have permanent ink embedded in their skin without making absolutely, positively certain every letter of it was correct — but if you'd...
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LISTS
05/04/2012
More of the best smart-ass responses to celebrities on Twitter.
Twitter has taught us so many wonderful things about communication, chief among them being that most of our nation's celebrities are blathering idiots. While reading tweets from the likes of...
24 comments
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FACEBOOK
05/03/2012
More idiotic confessions to criminal activity accidentally posted on Facebook.
Forget the Dislike button. Facebook needs a "Fifth Amendment" button. We always figured the compulsion of users to share every little detail of their lives could one day lead to a criminal...
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Notes
More of the most awkward, entertaining, or horrifying notes ever written by a roommate.
Photoshop
How to use Photoshop to make it look like your drunk friend had the night of his life.
Notes
Overprotective mom and dad leave extremely different goodbye notes.
Cartoons
What your entire life looks like when you're too picky about who you date.
Signs
Bathroom sign imposes unbelievably bizarre restriction.
Signs
Restaurant delivers best possible response to bad internet review.
Happy Place Original
What a brutally honest college diploma looks like.
Notes
More of the most entertaining, obnoxious, or completely insane notes written to neighbors.
Sex
The most convincing sales pitch for condoms in the history of procreation.
Lists
Stephen Colbert named 69th most beautiful woman in the world.
MORE POSTS »
TV News
Reporter's skirt adjustment nearly turns news clip into porn clip.
TV News
The most awkward conceivable way to declare you need a tan.
The Gays
The single-most deranged anti-gay rant ever read calmly into a microphone.
TV
What it would look like if every Sunday night show you watch was combined into one.
Food
Real-life Homer Simpson protests all-you-can-eat restaurant for cutting him off.
Videos
Heartfelt music video about Facebook more embarrassing than your friends' status updates.
Videos
Kids reenact Sabotage video in honor of MCA.
Videos
If Taxi Driver had been a Disney movie.
Mother's Day
How to compensate your mom for the grossest thing she ever did for you.
MORE VIDEOS »
Ben Greenman
Facebook stock should have its own Timeline so it can look back on happier days, like last Friday.
Jenny Johnson
Most people don't know this, but you can quietly be a Republican or a Democrat.
Ken Jennings
Matthew Fox is like the Windows XP of Jon Hamm.
Nicole Betz
I stay up at night worrying about what happens to the unquestioned Jeopardy answers.
kelly oxford
It's Morrissey's birthday today; spend a minute thinking about how crazy it is that he never killed himself.
h. jon benjamin
so far today, i read the ny times and googled 'hulk porn'
jon hendren
"i'm a passionate gamer" says incredible waste of human life
Michael Ian Black
Pretty sure most people aren't spending nearly enough time thinking about me.
IanWearsPants
I don't think I've ever initiated a conversation.
Matt Koff
LinkedIn is just one more way I've never connected with my dad.
MJ
I always make out with the entire restaurant staff before I eat anywhere, just so they know that spitting in my food won't be necessary.
Alex Blagg
I bet a chronological list of everything I've "liked" on the Internet would read like a short story about a man falling apart.
Michelle Wolf
if i ever want to get back at someone i'm dating, i just wipe back to front
donni
There must be a few vegetarians who just enjoy murdering vegetables.
Rob Kutner
Probably one of the hardest things for Pinocchio to pull off was complimenting his friend's experimental theater piece.
Megan Amram
I got out of jury duty by being the defendant
Gary Janetti
Never getting married. I don't need a piece of paper to tell me it's okay to emotionally torture someone.
Ari Scott
I hope God is almost done putting people on this earth to sing.
Jim Gaffigan
If there was an award for most pessimistic, I probably wouldn't even be nominated.
Leah Beckmann
I know I'm killing it if I'm having more of "hahaha" than a "haha" gchat kind of day.
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Headlines
One of the most creatively disgusting ways to get revenge on your boss.
News
5 people having a worse Monday than you.
Advice
Advice column receives letter from worst man you could possibly sleep with.
News
How every man wants to die.
Headlines
How not to treat a 79-year-old world-renowned actor.
Headlines
How an attempt at the perfect prom photo can go horribly wrong.
Mondays
5 people having a worse Monday than you.
Headlines
Headline about gay marriage succeeds in being as blatantly sexual as possible.
MORE “News” »
Just wanted to let you know that I love you even though you aren't naked right now.
No amount of tanning will ever change how hopelessly white you are.
Sorry I can't make it to your party, dinner, or event because I want to watch previously recorded television.
Here's to the Yankees and Red Sox making their historic rivalry a battle for last place.
I heard you go down even faster than Facebook stock.
Summer has snuck up once again on me and my giant ass.
May you live to be so old that your driving terrifies people.
I can't wait to start blaming my normal lack of productivity on it being summertime.
There should be a holiday dedicated to all the brave people who show up to work on Mondays.
If I was your coworker, I'd sexually harass you.
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