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NOTES
yesterday
Overprotective mom and dad leave extremely different goodbye notes.
Redditor mFsCaptcha (whom we assume is "Dylan") says his friend Eric's parents left these messages for the pair, who were about to embark on a road trip to a theme park in Idaho. These...
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NOTES
05/21/2012
More of the most entertaining, obnoxious, or completely insane notes written to neighbors.
As the earth's population continues to grow, humans are forced to live in ever closer proximity to each other, pissing each other off in new and disgusting ways. The neighbor note is the most...
67 comments
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NOTES
05/17/2012
More of the most awkward, entertaining, or horrifying notes ever written by a roommate.
Whether you're in your post-college years or your mid-forties and sleeping in your old room at your parents' house, the roommate situation is a hotbed of hostility and spoiled food-borne...
6 comments
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NOTES
05/16/2012
The most threatening note about internet access ever left by a 7-year-old child.
According to redditor surprisemailbox, this ominous note was left on the computer by his friend's 7-year-old sister, and for Christ's sake, everybody do what she says. Otherwise next...
11 comments
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05/03/2012
The most humiliating gift a mother could ever give her son.
Congratulations to this mom on screwing with her son's mind even more than he screws his own hand. It's bad enough to find out your mother is disturbingly well-versed in playful euphemisms...
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04/24/2012
More of the most delightfully hostile notes ever left on a car windshield.
When you saw the trailer for that movie Flash of Genius where Greg Kinnear plays the guy who invented windshield wipers, you were probably thinking, "If I ever decide to kill myself, it will...
119 comments
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04/04/2012
How to show your appreciation for an RA that slept with your girlfriend.
Either "getting in bed with my girlfriend" is a really delicate euphemism for "banging her furiously from behind while I was in Intro to Philosophy," or this student is really...
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03/15/2012
A high school love note that might make you pro-abstinence.
What is wrong with kids these days? Back when we were in high school, you wrote a lady a polite, romantic note to get your foot in the door, and then you creeped her out with your sex-obsessed...
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03/02/2012
What it looks like when you write yourself a note during an Ambien hallucination.
Redditor and Ambien user ajscraw claims to have woken up recently to this note, written the previous night in the middle of what appears to have been a full-on, Fear and Loathing in Las Vagas-level...
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02/02/2012
How to ward off a mental disorder during a meeting.
This amusingly insane sheet of notebook paper is an actual time-killing workplace doodle from Community writer Megan Ganz — capturing, in numerical form, exactly how boring a meeting is....
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Notes
More of the most awkward, entertaining, or horrifying notes ever written by a roommate.
Notes
Overprotective mom and dad leave extremely different goodbye notes.
Photoshop
How to use Photoshop to make it look like your drunk friend had the night of his life.
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Restaurant delivers best possible response to bad internet review.
Notes
More of the most entertaining, obnoxious, or completely insane notes written to neighbors.
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What a brutally honest college diploma looks like.
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Stephen Colbert named 69th most beautiful woman in the world.
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The most convincing sales pitch for condoms in the history of procreation.
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The single-most deranged anti-gay rant ever read calmly into a microphone.
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Heartfelt music video about Facebook more embarrassing than your friends' status updates.
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If Taxi Driver had been a Disney movie.
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It's Morrissey's birthday today; spend a minute thinking about how crazy it is that he never killed himself.
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so far today, i read the ny times and googled 'hulk porn'
jon hendren
"i'm a passionate gamer" says incredible waste of human life
Michael Ian Black
Pretty sure most people aren't spending nearly enough time thinking about me.
IanWearsPants
I don't think I've ever initiated a conversation.
Matt Koff
LinkedIn is just one more way I've never connected with my dad.
MJ
I always make out with the entire restaurant staff before I eat anywhere, just so they know that spitting in my food won't be necessary.
Alex Blagg
I bet a chronological list of everything I've "liked" on the Internet would read like a short story about a man falling apart.
Michelle Wolf
if i ever want to get back at someone i'm dating, i just wipe back to front
donni
There must be a few vegetarians who just enjoy murdering vegetables.
Rob Kutner
Probably one of the hardest things for Pinocchio to pull off was complimenting his friend's experimental theater piece.
Megan Amram
I got out of jury duty by being the defendant
Gary Janetti
Never getting married. I don't need a piece of paper to tell me it's okay to emotionally torture someone.
Ari Scott
I hope God is almost done putting people on this earth to sing.
Jim Gaffigan
If there was an award for most pessimistic, I probably wouldn't even be nominated.
Leah Beckmann
I know I'm killing it if I'm having more of "hahaha" than a "haha" gchat kind of day.
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One of the most creatively disgusting ways to get revenge on your boss.
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5 people having a worse Monday than you.
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Advice column receives letter from worst man you could possibly sleep with.
News
How every man wants to die.
Headlines
How not to treat a 79-year-old world-renowned actor.
Headlines
How an attempt at the perfect prom photo can go horribly wrong.
Mondays
5 people having a worse Monday than you.
Headlines
Headline about gay marriage succeeds in being as blatantly sexual as possible.
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No amount of tanning will ever change how hopelessly white you are.
Just wanted to let you know that I love you even though you aren't naked right now.
Sorry I can't make it to your party, dinner, or event because I want to watch previously recorded television.
Here's to the Yankees and Red Sox making their historic rivalry a battle for last place.
I heard you go down even faster than Facebook stock.
Summer has snuck up once again on me and my giant ass.
May you live to be so old that your driving terrifies people.
I work well with others when they leave me the fuck alone.
If I was your coworker, I'd sexually harass you.
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