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NOTES
yesterday
Overprotective mom and dad leave extremely different goodbye notes.
Redditor mFsCaptcha (whom we assume is "Dylan") says his friend Eric's parents left these messages for the pair, who were about to embark on a road trip to a theme park in Idaho. These...
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PARENTING
05/09/2012
Parents devise brilliant way to punish their daughter for being an idiot on the Internet.
"But mommy, what about all those photos of glasses of white wine that you're constantly pinning on Pinterest?!" This is an ingenious form of discipline. Though we hope this idea stays...
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LISTS
04/25/2012
More of the best examples of horrific and embarrassing parenting on Facebook.
Parents who were previously limited to humiliating, berating, and otherwise damaging their children in person have discovered they can do so in front of a much larger group of people on Facebook. The...
97 comments
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CRAIGSLIST
04/12/2012
Guy on Craigslist seeking male model for insane revenge plan on biological parents.
This is the most depressing twist on Cyrano de Bergerac we've ever read. This can only play out in one of two ways. Either the poster of the ad will get addicted to the approval and he'll...
16 comments
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OLD PEOPLE
02/24/2012
Proof that someone's mother is even worse with email than yours.
J. Doug Hastings recently received this in the mail — meaning the actual, guy-in-a-silly-hat U.S. Postal Service — from his dear, sweet mother. It may appear to be a printed out email...
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BEST OF 2011
12/29/2011
The 50 most brilliant, obnoxious, or delightfully sociopathic Facebook posts of 2011.
After spending a good chunk of this year gathering Facebook posts entertaining enough for public consumption and/or ridicule, it felt less like we were putting together a humor website and more like...
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CHRISTMAS SEASON
12/15/2011
How to put your child in a humiliating holiday photo before it's even born.
We don't recall any lines from "Frosty the Snowman" about him horrifically emerging from an expectant mother's torso with milk-engorged breasts laying across his forehead. This must...
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SIGNS
12/08/2011
How to punish a teenager's property damage with long-term emotional damage.
While we're not entirely certain which parent crafted this ingenious form of public punishment, we're pretty sure only a girl's father could come up with something this humiliating. On...
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REGRETTABLE ERRORS
10/03/2011
Book guarantees your baby will get bullied throughout the entirety of preschool.
This book is perfect if you're trying to raise the next Mark Zuckerberg, but it will also mean years of your lonely child manipulating HTML by night and getting swirlies by day. Remember, nerd...
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UP ALL NIGHT
09/12/2011
Parenting nightmare.
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Notes
More of the most awkward, entertaining, or horrifying notes ever written by a roommate.
Notes
Overprotective mom and dad leave extremely different goodbye notes.
Photoshop
How to use Photoshop to make it look like your drunk friend had the night of his life.
Cartoons
What your entire life looks like when you're too picky about who you date.
Signs
Bathroom sign imposes unbelievably bizarre restriction.
Signs
Restaurant delivers best possible response to bad internet review.
Notes
More of the most entertaining, obnoxious, or completely insane notes written to neighbors.
Happy Place Original
What a brutally honest college diploma looks like.
Lists
Stephen Colbert named 69th most beautiful woman in the world.
Sex
The most convincing sales pitch for condoms in the history of procreation.
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TV News
Reporter's skirt adjustment nearly turns news clip into porn clip.
TV News
The most awkward conceivable way to declare you need a tan.
The Gays
The single-most deranged anti-gay rant ever read calmly into a microphone.
Food
Real-life Homer Simpson protests all-you-can-eat restaurant for cutting him off.
TV
What it would look like if every Sunday night show you watch was combined into one.
Videos
Heartfelt music video about Facebook more embarrassing than your friends' status updates.
Videos
Kids reenact Sabotage video in honor of MCA.
Videos
If Taxi Driver had been a Disney movie.
Mother's Day
How to compensate your mom for the grossest thing she ever did for you.
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Ben Greenman
Facebook stock should have its own Timeline so it can look back on happier days, like last Friday.
Jenny Johnson
Most people don't know this, but you can quietly be a Republican or a Democrat.
Ken Jennings
Matthew Fox is like the Windows XP of Jon Hamm.
Nicole Betz
I stay up at night worrying about what happens to the unquestioned Jeopardy answers.
kelly oxford
It's Morrissey's birthday today; spend a minute thinking about how crazy it is that he never killed himself.
h. jon benjamin
so far today, i read the ny times and googled 'hulk porn'
jon hendren
"i'm a passionate gamer" says incredible waste of human life
Michael Ian Black
Pretty sure most people aren't spending nearly enough time thinking about me.
IanWearsPants
I don't think I've ever initiated a conversation.
Matt Koff
LinkedIn is just one more way I've never connected with my dad.
MJ
I always make out with the entire restaurant staff before I eat anywhere, just so they know that spitting in my food won't be necessary.
Alex Blagg
I bet a chronological list of everything I've "liked" on the Internet would read like a short story about a man falling apart.
Michelle Wolf
if i ever want to get back at someone i'm dating, i just wipe back to front
donni
There must be a few vegetarians who just enjoy murdering vegetables.
Rob Kutner
Probably one of the hardest things for Pinocchio to pull off was complimenting his friend's experimental theater piece.
Megan Amram
I got out of jury duty by being the defendant
Gary Janetti
Never getting married. I don't need a piece of paper to tell me it's okay to emotionally torture someone.
Ari Scott
I hope God is almost done putting people on this earth to sing.
Jim Gaffigan
If there was an award for most pessimistic, I probably wouldn't even be nominated.
Leah Beckmann
I know I'm killing it if I'm having more of "hahaha" than a "haha" gchat kind of day.
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Headlines
One of the most creatively disgusting ways to get revenge on your boss.
News
5 people having a worse Monday than you.
Advice
Advice column receives letter from worst man you could possibly sleep with.
News
How every man wants to die.
Headlines
How not to treat a 79-year-old world-renowned actor.
Headlines
How an attempt at the perfect prom photo can go horribly wrong.
Mondays
5 people having a worse Monday than you.
Headlines
Headline about gay marriage succeeds in being as blatantly sexual as possible.
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No amount of tanning will ever change how hopelessly white you are.
Just wanted to let you know that I love you even though you aren't naked right now.
Sorry I can't make it to your party, dinner, or event because I want to watch previously recorded television.
Here's to the Yankees and Red Sox making their historic rivalry a battle for last place.
I heard you go down even faster than Facebook stock.
Summer has snuck up once again on me and my giant ass.
May you live to be so old that your driving terrifies people.
I work well with others when they leave me the fuck alone.
If I was your coworker, I'd sexually harass you.
I can't wait to start blaming my normal lack of productivity on it being summertime.
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