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HALLOWEEN
10/31/2011
The most deranged Halloween pumpkins ever carved.
If we're being honest, most of us don't put much effort into our jack-o'-lanterns beyond "triangle eyes, triangle nose, mouth with one tooth." It's boring, it's lazy,...
11 comments
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VIDEOS
07/25/2011
Styrofoam cup reenacts your weekend.
Using a cup not unlike the one you drank 13 bourbon and Cokes out of, this bored fast-food patron has created a remarkably dead-on depiction of your Saturday night and/or Sunday morning, complete...
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CRY FOR HELP
06/17/2011
How to discreetly ruin a group photo and several friendships.
You might not notice it at first, but eventually your eyes will catch the subtle revoltingness that's about to spill across that crowded table. Our compliments to the camera person for not...
10 comments
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NOTES
06/01/2011
The most adorably comforting bag you'll ever throw up into.
It's nice to see someone use an airline vomit bag for something other than vomiting, especially if it might calm the nerves of some other nauseous flyer. Of course, looking into the beady,...
4 comments
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WEDDING
04/25/2011
The perfect gift for anyone planning to throw up during the royal wedding.
There are endless reasons to vomit during this Friday's royal wedding ceremony, and Carlisle-based artist Lydia Leith has provided the perfect memorabilia for the occasion. The artist recommends...
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REMINDERS
11/25/2010
How to simultaneously ward off rapists and shed some pounds.
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WEDDING
07/23/2010
Mediocre wedding toast salvaged by woman projectile vomiting on herself.
Toasting newlyweds is a time-honored, nerve-wracking tradition that usually results in a pretty soused speaker. This spectacular video demonstrates an interesting solution to help calm your nerves:...
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Older Posts
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More disastrous and embarrassing cases of people forgetting to log out of Facebook.
Notes
More of the most awkward, entertaining, or horrifying notes ever written by a roommate.
Summer
Craigslist ad offers great summer house opportunity for ugly people.
Notes
More of the most entertaining, obnoxious, or completely insane notes written to neighbors.
Weddings
A new way to dress as reprehensibly as possible on your wedding day.
Photoshop
How to use Photoshop to make it look like your drunk friend had the night of his life.
Signs
Restaurant delivers best possible response to bad internet review.
Cartoons
What your entire life looks like when you're too picky about who you date.
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TV
Anderson Cooper kicks horrifying plastic surgery addict off show for being "dreadful."
TV News
Reporter's skirt adjustment nearly turns news clip into porn clip.
TV News
The most awkward conceivable way to declare you need a tan.
The Gays
The single-most deranged anti-gay rant ever read calmly into a microphone.
Food
Real-life Homer Simpson protests all-you-can-eat restaurant for cutting him off.
TV
What it would look like if every Sunday night show you watch was combined into one.
Videos
Heartfelt music video about Facebook more embarrassing than your friends' status updates.
Videos
Kids reenact Sabotage video in honor of MCA.
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Artie Johann
If I were a bird, I'd be the one who shows up right as they finish the nest.
Ben Greenman
Facebook stock should have its own Timeline so it can look back on happier days, like last Friday.
Jenny Johnson
Most people don't know this, but you can quietly be a Republican or a Democrat.
Ken Jennings
Matthew Fox is like the Windows XP of Jon Hamm.
Nicole Betz
I stay up at night worrying about what happens to the unquestioned Jeopardy answers.
kelly oxford
It's Morrissey's birthday today; spend a minute thinking about how crazy it is that he never killed himself.
h. jon benjamin
so far today, i read the ny times and googled 'hulk porn'
jon hendren
"i'm a passionate gamer" says incredible waste of human life
Michael Ian Black
Pretty sure most people aren't spending nearly enough time thinking about me.
IanWearsPants
I don't think I've ever initiated a conversation.
Matt Koff
LinkedIn is just one more way I've never connected with my dad.
MJ
I always make out with the entire restaurant staff before I eat anywhere, just so they know that spitting in my food won't be necessary.
Alex Blagg
I bet a chronological list of everything I've "liked" on the Internet would read like a short story about a man falling apart.
Michelle Wolf
if i ever want to get back at someone i'm dating, i just wipe back to front
donni
There must be a few vegetarians who just enjoy murdering vegetables.
Rob Kutner
Probably one of the hardest things for Pinocchio to pull off was complimenting his friend's experimental theater piece.
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Headlines
One of the most creatively disgusting ways to get revenge on your boss.
News
5 people having a worse Monday than you.
Advice
Advice column receives letter from worst man you could possibly sleep with.
News
How every man wants to die.
Headlines
How not to treat a 79-year-old world-renowned actor.
Mondays
5 people having a worse Monday than you.
Headlines
How an attempt at the perfect prom photo can go horribly wrong.
Headlines
Headline about gay marriage succeeds in being as blatantly sexual as possible.
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No amount of tanning will ever change how hopelessly white you are.
Just wanted to let you know that I love you even though you aren't naked right now.
If you were Jesus, today would be Christmas.
Happy birthday to one of the few people whose birthday I can remember without a Facebook reminder.
Summer has snuck up once again on me and my giant ass.
May you live to be so old that your driving terrifies people.
I heard you go down even faster than Facebook stock.
Have a joyous time celebrating the day your face rubbed your mother's vagina.
My favorite thing about summer is having a valid excuse for my excessive sweating.
I can't wait to start blaming my normal lack of productivity on it being summertime.
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Work Feels Overwhelming
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Dating Profile
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More Into Your Birthday
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Four Figures A Year
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