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Wisconsin
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MAPS
01/13/2012
Plan your weekend with this map of the drunkest states in the U.S.
Based on a new report from the CDC, this map ranks each state based on its percentage of "binge drinkers," which those lab-coat wearing weenies define as "five or more drinks in a...
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NEWS
11/14/2011
5 people having a worse Monday than you.
5. Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker - Wisconsin's public enemy number one is learning that it's not smart to piss off people who have nothing to do but drink beer, watch the Packers, and hate your...
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SIGNS
03/15/2011
Wisconsin theater marquee offers movie role to governor.
This Madison, Wisconsin theater marquee takes aim at union-busting Governor Scott Walker, which makes it the funniest thing involving Total Recall and an unpopular governor since the actual film...
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CONFESSION
03/13/2011
What the welcome sign to Wisconsin will now say.
Some intrepid union supporter with a sly sense of humor and/or possibly Photoshop turned this Wisconsin welcome sign into a clever indictment against the much-maligned Koch brothers — the...
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SOMEWHAT TOPICAL
03/01/2011
World's most ineffective protest sign.
The protests in Wisconsin are probably still raging. We're not totally sure because we haven't seen anything on CNN lately. All we know is that one Midwesterner is less than angered by the...
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Summer
Craigslist ad offers great summer house opportunity for ugly people.
Notes
More of the most entertaining, obnoxious, or completely insane notes written to neighbors.
Weddings
A new way to dress as reprehensibly as possible on your wedding day.
Photoshop
How to use Photoshop to make it look like your drunk friend had the night of his life.
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Anderson Cooper kicks horrifying plastic surgery addict off show for being "dreadful."
TV News
Reporter's skirt adjustment nearly turns news clip into porn clip.
TV News
The most awkward conceivable way to declare you need a tan.
The Gays
The single-most deranged anti-gay rant ever read calmly into a microphone.
Food
Real-life Homer Simpson protests all-you-can-eat restaurant for cutting him off.
TV
What it would look like if every Sunday night show you watch was combined into one.
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Artie Johann
If I were a bird, I'd be the one who shows up right as they finish the nest.
Ben Greenman
Facebook stock should have its own Timeline so it can look back on happier days, like last Friday.
Jenny Johnson
Most people don't know this, but you can quietly be a Republican or a Democrat.
Ken Jennings
Matthew Fox is like the Windows XP of Jon Hamm.
Nicole Betz
I stay up at night worrying about what happens to the unquestioned Jeopardy answers.
kelly oxford
It's Morrissey's birthday today; spend a minute thinking about how crazy it is that he never killed himself.
h. jon benjamin
so far today, i read the ny times and googled 'hulk porn'
jon hendren
"i'm a passionate gamer" says incredible waste of human life
Michael Ian Black
Pretty sure most people aren't spending nearly enough time thinking about me.
IanWearsPants
I don't think I've ever initiated a conversation.
Matt Koff
LinkedIn is just one more way I've never connected with my dad.
MJ
I always make out with the entire restaurant staff before I eat anywhere, just so they know that spitting in my food won't be necessary.
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One of the most creatively disgusting ways to get revenge on your boss.
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5 people having a worse Monday than you.
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Advice column receives letter from worst man you could possibly sleep with.
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How every man wants to die.
Headlines
How not to treat a 79-year-old world-renowned actor.
Mondays
5 people having a worse Monday than you.
Headlines
How an attempt at the perfect prom photo can go horribly wrong.
Headlines
Headline about gay marriage succeeds in being as blatantly sexual as possible.
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No amount of tanning will ever change how hopelessly white you are.
Just wanted to let you know that I love you even though you aren't naked right now.
If you were Jesus, today would be Christmas.
Happy birthday to one of the few people whose birthday I can remember without a Facebook reminder.
Summer has snuck up once again on me and my giant ass.
May you live to be so old that your driving terrifies people.
I heard you go down even faster than Facebook stock.
Have a joyous time celebrating the day your face rubbed your mother's vagina.
My favorite thing about summer is having a valid excuse for my excessive sweating.
I can't wait to start blaming my normal lack of productivity on it being summertime.
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