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Rob Kutner 05/21/2012

Probably one of the hardest things for Pinocchio to pull off was complimenting his friend's experimental theater piece.
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Rob Kutner 05/16/2012

Yo Yo Ma is the most talented cellist who also sounds like a Long Island Kid's last cries while drowning.
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Rob Kutner 05/15/2012

"Rihanna is starring in BATTLESHIP" is proof that Hollywood is now being run by Mad Libs.
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Rob Kutner 05/04/2012

RIP Adam Yauch - one of the Jackie Robinsons of making rap safe for white people.
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Rob Kutner 04/16/2012

It's hard to believe one day my grandkids will say, "Tell us about a time when there was only a 2-D dead Tupac."
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Rob Kutner 03/27/2012

BREAKING: Panicked Geraldo Rivera Shoots Slightly Tan Mark Zuckerberg
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Rob Kutner 03/13/2012

Starbucks is basically an unemployment office with scones.
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Rob Kutner 02/27/2012

"That is SO 5 minutes from now." -Hipster Merlin
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Rob Kutner 02/16/2012

I can kill a man with my bare hands, but it will take a few years and it's mostly because I don't wash up.
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Rob Kutner 02/06/2012

Gisele Bundchen was so upset over criticism of Tom Brady, she nearly gained her appetite.
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Rob Kutner 01/13/2012

Just got a million-dollar book advance for my not-yet-created blog, "Shit People Whose Mouths Literally Produce Feces Say"
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Rob Kutner 01/10/2012

BREAKING: GOP Votes to Define Marriage as Exclusively Between A Male Corporation and A Female Corporation
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Rob Kutner 12/14/2011

An instant rebuttal to the centuries'-old charge that Jews killed Jesus is "2 minutes of me trying to use a hammer."
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Rob Kutner 11/30/2011

My two questions to Herman Cain: "What were you thinking?" and "13 years?! How did you keep the spark alive?"
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Rob Kutner 11/15/2011

BREAKING: Herman Cain Accused of Sexual Harassment by Female Adam Sandler
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Rob Kutner 11/09/2011

The Little Engine That Could When Massively Coked Up #ChildrensBooksMadeMoreExciting
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Rob Kutner 10/25/2011

Saw a cat chasing a hummingbird and literally thought, "Wow, this is almost like YouTube!"
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Rob Kutner 10/24/2011

Vatican proposes global body to oversee economic markets. And to REALLY crack down on masturbation.
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Rob Kutner 10/18/2011

"Like me, and I'll give you stuff!" Companies on Facebook = Weekend custody Dads
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Rob Kutner 10/06/2011

Financial sector shocked at passing of Steve Jobs -- mosty, the idea of a guy who got rich from actually creating something.
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Rob Kutner 09/12/2011

The NY Times weddings page should do updates later with a cute photo of the couple's kid and therapist.
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Rob Kutner 08/30/2011

I wish I could get through a visit to my in-laws' via a montage.
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Rob Kutner 06/27/2011

Rick Santorum: "I have no problem with homosexuality, but w/homosexual acts." "You just need to relax," says his partner Chad.
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Rob Kutner 06/24/2011

On the bright side, I bet Peter Falk is getting a LOT of his questions answered now.
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Rob Kutner 06/23/2011

"What? Now You're Not Going to Do It?" (if Nike were Jewish)
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